I can’t believe that I am 39 1/2 today. In exactly 6 months I will be in Milan, Italy setting off on one of the greatest adventures of my life. It seems impossible that I’ve made it this far. The time is going by so fast. I have made so many plans in consideration of the process that I would go through leading up to this trip, that I have yet to complete. I made goals that I haven’t accomplished and promises that I haven’t kept, yet am at peace with it all. I am accepting the fact that I can only do my best each and every day and on some days my best is pure awesomeness, and on other days my best is an embarrassment.
I am learning to not be ashamed of my short-comings. I set huge goals and they are hard to achieve, but I like living like this! I would much rather make promises of amazing accomplishments and great success to myself and come up short, than to never dream. I do not want to except less than everything I am capable of in my life. I want to strive for my set goals and when needed, fail at accomplishing them. The process makes me whole.
I have fallen flat on my face, so to speak, so many times in the past 39 1/2 years. I have laughed and cried through it all because I am truly living. I am out there. I am alive. And people are taking notice.
The next 6 months are going to be amazing for many reasons. First and foremost, God is with me. I am also surrounded by friends that love me and make me better daily. And, my children are paying close attention to see if I can do all that I need to do for myself and still find the time to love them. It’s not easy. I want to work, plan, write, build relationships; make my way in this life! But, without taking the time to be with God, care for my health and the needs of my beautiful daughters first, my best laid plans may never see the light of day.
May God lead us all to the light…and me to Italy in 181 days. xo